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One Man's Trash

[The episode begins with Gumball and Darwin eating lunch in the school cafeteria. Sharing each other's bewilderment, they observe the unusual gifts received by their classmates]
Carmen: [Unwraps a retainer] Uh...
[Juke sprays himself with an air freshener and coughs; Masami stares in confusion at a high-heel shoe filled with a gooey yellow substance]
Gumball and Darwin: [Disgusted] Ugh.
Sussie: Here. A present for you. [Hands Idaho a piece of paper]
Idaho: [Holds up the drawing of two concentric circles] What is it?
Sussie: It's a map of an egg.
Idaho: Uh, huh. [Chuckles nervously] Thanks?
[Sussie leaves]
Idaho: [Baffled] What was that?
Banana Joe: [Shrugs] I dunno. [Pulls out a live frog covered in glitter] What is this?
Darwin: Why does Sussie always give everyone such lame gifts?
Gumball: Yeah! And where's my lame gift?! I demand dissatisfaction!
[Sussie passes in front of their table]
Darwin: [Gasps; Whispers] Here she comes.
[Gumball extends his hand in anticipation; Sussie reaches into her pocket and coats his palm with an off-white glob]
Gumball: [Appalled] What the what is that?!
Sussie: Mayonnaise.
Gumball: Why?
Sussie: It's very precious. You can moisturize your elbows with it, or write with it, or feed it to a car.
Gumball: O...kay, so you just keep mayonnaise in all your pockets?
Sussie: [Laughs heartily] Don't be silly. Sussie not crazy, she keeps different sauces in different pockets. [Patting her other pouches] This one's for mustard, this one's for ketchup, and this one's for toothpaste!
Gumball: Sussie, toothpaste is not a sauce.
Sussie: Yes it is. It's tooth sauce! That's why it tastes like mint. [Moves to Darwin's side] Sussie got present for you too.
Darwin: [Anxious] What is it?
Sussie: It's a crumpled green picture of an old man.
Darwin: I'll pass.
Sussie: Okay. [Produces a one hundred dollar bill and tears it in half]
Darwin: Uh-- [Sighs]
Sussie: Oh, don't be sad. You can have my dancing raisin.
[Sussie places a black widow spider on his fin. Darwin jumps on top of the stool as the spider crawls up his arm. He screams and flails his limbs to try and shake it off]
Sussie: [Laughs] You're dancing together! Sussie happy you're happy.
[The spider eventually bites him in the back. Groaning, he falls face first on the lunch tray]
Sussie: Ah, he kissed you. He must like you.
[The school bell rings, and Masami and Carmen file outside. Stopping by the garbage bin, they toss the gifts and place their trays on top]
Sussie: [Sad] Ohh, don't they like Sussie presents?
Gumball: Come on, guys. [Intercepts Juke] Make a little effort to spare her feelings. Do it on the down-low.
[Juke groans, deposits the tray, and sticks the aerosol can in his shirt. As he passes the bin, a hand comes out the back of his shirt and dumps the can]
Gumball: There, that's more like it.
[Gumball pats Juke's shoulder, then wipes off mayonnaise on his back as he goes away. Jared approaches, his lunch tray bearing a large humanoid tooth wrapped in a bow]
Gumball: [Hushed] Dude!
[Jared sighs, pockets the tooth, and tears off his pants, throwing them into the receptacle]
Gumball: Well played, well played. [Wipes some mayo on his back as well]
Banana Joe: [Looks at his frog] Uh... Ah!
[Banana Joe grabs his stem and manages to throw himself in the trash. The glittery frog, now suspended in mid-air, floats past Gumball]
Gumball: Uh, yeah. [Rubs the last of the mayo on the frog] That's good too, I guess.

Hey There, Sussie

[The bell rings again. Sussie is seated on a bench in the school playground, making gurgling noises and other strange vocalizations. Bomb Guy, Rotten Cupcake, Rat, and Pink Bear come up to her]
Bomb Guy: Hey weirdo, I've got a present for you.
Sussie: Yaaay!
[He spits his gum into her hand. Sussie puts it in her mouth, chews, then blows a bubble. It bursts, covering her face, and the delinquents all snicker. Meanwhile, Gumball and Darwin are watching this from a distance]
Gumball: [Drops his backpack; Incensed] Alright, I'ma fight these punks!
[Gumball strips, removing his sweater, undershirt, and pants]
Darwin: What, Greco-Roman style? Maybe that isn't the solution.
Gumball: So what do you suggest?
Darwin: Perhaps Sussie's making herself a target by being so... weird.
Gumball: [Thinks] Hmm. I see. So you're saying we poison the town water supply with lead until everyone becomes as weird as her.
Darwin: I meant we help her fit in better.
Gumball: And then poison the water! Two really good plans. One is great, the other one's really good. There's no way to choose between them.
[Darwin glares at him, his eyebrow raised]
Gumball: Okay fine. We'll help her fit in. But where should we start?
Darwin: Let's just observe a normal day in her life.
[Cheerful music plays, with Sussie acting out the events detailed in the song's lyrics]
Music: Hey there, Sussie, sleepyhead
Rise and shine, get out of bed
Fix your face and clean your teeth
Beauty comes from underneath
Hey there, Sussie
The world is waiting [Repeats four times]
And everything is fascinating
Hey there, Sussie, give us a grin
And take the whole world on the chin
Get out that door, and go and seize the day
The world's a playground, time to play
Nothing can stop this happy girl
Apart from bending, or giving a twirl
Hey there, Sussie, it'll turn out right
She's not fussy, she's not uptight
Wears chicken skin as a hat
It goes well with her meat cravat
She'll eat a pack of scented candles
She's not afraid to lick door handles
She might bathe in rancid fruit
Or even toot into a--
[Gumball quickly turns the camera away from Sussie]
Gumball: I think we've seen enough, thank you. Definitely time for phase two.
Sussie: [Singing] Hold on Gumball, what's phase two?
Gumball: [Singing] The part where you stop being you.

Keep Your Chin Up

[Gumball and Darwin are in their bedroom, standing next to Sussie]
Gumball: First, we need to redefine your identity. But it's kinda hard to do that without even knowing exactly what you are. I mean, no offense, but you do look like the result of some novelty app. How did something like... [Gestures at Sussie] that happen?
Sussie: Well, once upon a time there lived a Mommy chin and a Daddy chin, and Daddy fed Mommy so much food that she ended up with a double chin. And the double chin got bigger and bigger, so she went to the doctor, and the doctor said, "That's not a double chin--"
Gumball: [Gasps] That's Sussie!
Sussie: No, he was wrong, it was a double chin. We got a second opinion. But, three years later, Mommy chin laid an egg.
Darwin: And that's where Sussie came from.
Sussie: Nah, it was just because she ate an egg. But two years before that, Mommy chin put a magic bean inside Daddy chin's mouth, and his belly started to grow. And then a voice came from inside it, and it said--
Gumball: [Altering his voice] It's me, Sussie!
Sussie: No, it was more like-- [Blows a raspberry]
[Gumball and Darwin sigh]
Sussie: And then seven years later, Sussie born!
Gumball: [Miffed] All right, whatever.
Darwin: What we mean is, you'll fit in more if you change.
Gumball: Not fit in totally, that's just not gonna happen. But it'll be, you know, like having a lip piercing instead of a face tattoo.
Darwin: Or more like a funny story, instead of national news.
Gumball: Yeah, exactly. More "a little freaky" than "a little freak show."
[Sussie frowns sadly]
Gumball: Let's start with the look. [Dabs Sussie with a makeup pad] Hmm. I'm not quite sure that accentuating her jawline helped.
[She appears to have a five o' clock shadow]
Darwin: Looks like a meat pyramid. Uh, maybe she needs some hair.
[He reaches forward to alter something; Sussie now has a full beard, and Gumball and Darwin are weirded out]
Gumball: Eh. Looks like her hair is tryin' to escape from her face.
Sussie: Ha. [Parts her lips]
Gumball: The teeth! It's the teeth that's the problem! [Makes adjustments] And the nose. She needs a nose. And a neck. Ooh, and eyebrows. [Finishes, and steps back] There.
Darwin: Umm...
[They scrutinize her bizarre, fully human face]
Darwin: Uhh, you know, sometimes less is more.
Gumball: Okay, uh, let me try something.
[Gumball covers the screen with his hands. When he lowers them, Sussie seems to be headless]
Gumball: Yeah, that's better.
[Her head pops back out from her collar; She looks depressed]
Sussie: Mm. Why Gumball, Darwin, try change Sussie?
Gumball: [Sighs] You know, people aren't always nice. The world can be harsh.
Darwin: It can be confusing, heartless, and cruel. It can turn on anything that is different, that goes against the norm.
Gumball: Yeah, and-- [Wavers] I don't want to hurt your feelings. So, I'll put this in the most delicate way I can. You know the story of "The Ugly Duckling?"
Sussie: [Excited] It becomes beautiful!
Gumball: Exactly. But in that story, you'd be the mutant bog creature that eats the swan, makes all the children cry, and eventually gets hunted down and torched by the townsfolk.
[Sussie is saddened again]
Gumball: W-w-wait, that came out wrong.
Sussie: [Cheers up momentarily] Ah?
Gumball: I meant screeching flesh pile, not mutant bog creature.
Sussie: Mm. Sussie understand.
[Dispirited, she gets up, exits the bedroom, and closes the door. Gumball and Darwin sigh in sympathy]

Eye Of The Beholder

[The door reopens, and Sussie holds out two pairs of googly eyes, offering them to the brothers]
Darwin: Uh, I don't think we deserve another present.
Sussie: [Whispers] Just put them on.
Gumball: Why?
Sussie: So you can see what Sussie sees.
[Gumball and Darwin shrug, then decide to humor her. When they stick the plastic eyes over their own, their mouths deform to match Sussie's. All three of them wave their arms in the air, as the art style of the entire room and its occupants changes to resemble that of a children's drawing]
Sussie, Gumball, and Darwin: Aaah!
[Whimsical music starts to play, and they embark on a flight of fancy, singing along as they travel around town]
Sussie: You think I'm a weirdo, but look out your window. It's my decision to make the world my vision. When I walk down the street, everything looks quite sweet.
Gumball: I think I might pass on eating from this guy's grass
Darwin: Aren't you scared of the germs? This is how you get worms.
Sussie: Anything can be food, if you're in the right mood. 'Cause I am free. It's the key, doesn't matter what people think of me. I pick up things from the ground, keep everything that I found.
Gumball: What will you do with this trash?
Darwin: It's gonna give you a rash.
Sussie: I offer it to my friends, so they can see life through my lens.
Sussie, Gumball, and Darwin: La-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la.
Sussie: My laugh is not gracious, but it is contagious. It's important to share all the joy you have spare.
Sussie, Gumball, and Darwin: 'Cause I am free. It's the key, doesn't matter what people think of me.
Sussie: So I brush my teeth with goo, I drink my soup from my shoe, I keep mayo in my pocket, turn a snake into a puppet, toot to a solo flute. I like to sing in the nude, but only at the shopping center, the acoustics are much better. Plant a sausage in the ground, so that a new pig comes around--
Bomb Guy: Hey!
[The song ends, returning them to reality; Sussie, Gumball, and Darwin, are in an open, grassy field. Opposite them, are Bomb Guy and his fellow delinquents]
Bomb Guy: What do you call a chin with two butts?
Darwin: Um... Butty McButt Chin?
Bomb Guy: [Off-guard] Wait, I was... I was gonna say names, but it doesn't work if-- [Face-palms] Ah, never mind. [To the others] Insult them!
Pink Bear: Hey look. It's Tweedledum, Tweedledee, and Tweedlederp!
Rotten Cupcake: You look like the underside of a stingray!
Rat: If you losers were a movie, it'd be called "The Ugly, the Ugly, and the Ugly."
Bomb Guy: Next time your parents drop you, try to land on your face! Might be an improvement.
[They laugh mockingly]
Bomb Guy: [To Gumball] Give me your wallet.
[Gumball steps forward, reaches into his pocket, and smears some mayo on Bomb Guy's glove]
Bomb Guy: [Angered] What the?! What is wrong with you?! Why'd you do that?!
Sussie, Gumball, and Darwin: [Singing] 'Cause I am free. It's the key, doesn't matter what people think of me.
[Their fanciful journey continues, and they fly away as Bomb Guy's fuse ignites]
Bomb Guy: Ah-AAAH! [His head explodes]
[The episode ends]
veTAWOGEPISODESfont Transcript
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